Brave Space Ground Rule #5: No Attacks

This is Part 4 of a 5 Part series unpacking the concept of Brave Spaces. Find more info here: What Do You Mean Brave Spaces? I Want Safety! and here: Ground Rule #1: Controversy with Civility, Ground Rule #2: Own Intent and Impact, Ground Rule #3: Challenge by Choice, and Ground Rule #4: Respect. 

Brave Space Ground Rule #5: No Attacks: Where learners agree not to inflict harm on one another intentionally. Participants do not make personal attacks. Participants commit to adhering to group agreements.

Brian Arao and Kristi Clemens, authors of A New Way To Frame Dialogue Around Diversity and Social Justice, share that participants typically agree with this ground rule. The following tips provide context for brave spaces with no attacks, particularly for facilitators:

1. Invite clarifying conversation to define the difference between a personal attack on an individual and a challenge to an individual’s belief or statement that makes the individual uncomfortable.
2. When statements are experienced as personal attacks but are challenges, it is essential to remind the group of the brave space ground rules, modeling what they each look like. Example statements that can be experienced as a personal attack in justice and equity spaces are
   
   “I feel that statement is sexist,”
   “Your heteronormative assumptions hurt me,” or
   “I am angry because you are excluding the voice of the marginalized.”
   
   
3. Remind group members that pointed challenges are not necessarily attacks while recognizing that the uncomfortable experience may lead to a defensive reaction.

It can be gratifying to help a group hold tension together to prioritize the bravery of the whole and the overarching social justice commitment instead of protecting the safety and comfort of those with the most power and agency. 

What is most challenging to you as you consider your ability to learn and grow, building brave spaces toward inclusion and liberation? What is your motivation to be a part of brave spaces?

How can you take action, practicing the ground rule of No Attacks?

Fellow leaders and learners, I wish you courage and joy on the journey.